Living Life to the fullest.

* I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either.

* Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

* If you don't have an attitude Problem, you have a perception problem.

* Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.

* Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

* A pat on the back is only a few inches from a kick in the butt.

* Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

* After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.

* The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

* When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.

* Following the rules will not get the job done.

* Only the mediocre are at their best all the time.

* There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.

* If at first you don't succeed......skydiving isn't for you.

* Life is a waste of time; time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life.

* When everything is coming your way......you're in the wrong lane.

Cross posted in smiles.